Thursday, November 13, 2008
Doctor, I'm so angry at my boyfriend that I must call him Bastard. I
feel that he's gone too far, and he deserves it.'
'Hmm? Such a word is strong and rude. But may be you have your own
reasons. Tell me about it so that I can help you.'
'Yes, thank you, Doctor. There was one night...we parked our car
besides the beach and we were alone... and... he held my hand....'
'Did he hold your hand like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're holding it now'
'If it's only this, he doesn't deserve to be called Bastard. It means
he doesn't want to be separated from you.'
'Then, he leaned his body towards me... and hugged me...'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're doing.'
'It's not a Bastard.
It means he wanna stay forever by your side'
'Then he kissed me...'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly like how you're kissing me.'
'If its only a kiss like this, seriously you can't call him Bastard.
it means he adores you.'
'Then he put his hands inside my clothes and touched my boobs, Doc...'
'Yes, Doctor... exactly like that'
'It's not behavior of a bastard. It means he wants to protect you.'
'Then he took off all my clothes... slowly... '
'Did you resist?'
No. I let him do it, coz I love him...'
'Did he take off your clothes like this?'
'Yes, Doctor. Until I'm completely naked like now......'
'He still doesn't deserve to be called
'Bastard, because it means he wanna learn about your body completely.'
'Then he kissed me and put his.... inside me and had sex with me...'
'Did he do it just like what we do?'
'Yes, Doctor. Exactly the same'
'You still can't call him Bastard. It means he needs you.'
'But then he told me that he has AIDS'
*All the staff and patients outside heard the doctor
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Monday, September 8, 2008
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Friday, August 1, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Airport security: Your real name please….
Passenger: My name is Bat – Man
Airport security: Are you trying to be funny? What is your family name?
Passenger: S uparman
Airport security handcuffs him & puts him into a locked security roomThen they checked his passport………………………
Click image to enlarge..
Monday, July 28, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Customer Service - pretending to serve the customers when what you want is more money from them.
Proactive Approach - doing something the entire time even if you are either preventing a problem or in fact creating more problems. But do something, always.
Time Management – allocating your time so that you will end up with only 4 hours of sleep every day.
Business Trip - free travel
Monday, June 2, 2008
On and on
She just keeps on trying
And she smiles when she feels like crying
On and on, on and on, on and on
Thursday, May 22, 2008
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton grabs a wide margin over rival Senator Barrack Obama in the State of Denial.
Follow this link.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
when they came into his office, would help themselves to his pure Havana cigars.
"They just take 'em by the handful," he said. "Why don't you lock them up?"
asked Mr Cary. "Never could remember to do it," returned Edison.
"Then, Johnson, my secretary you know, did a clever trick.
He had a friend in the cigar business and promised to get him to
make me some entirely of cabbage leaves and brown paper.
I thought that was a fine scheme. But the cigars didn't come,
so I asked him one day about it when I noticed my Havanas
disappearing again. 'Why, I sent them to you,' he said.
'I left them with your manager.' I called the manager in
and asked him where those cigars were. 'Why,' he said,
'I put them in your valise when you went to California
last month. I didn't know what they were.'"
"Do you know, Cary," continued Edison,
"I smoked everyone of those damned cigars myself!"
Monday, April 28, 2008
Engineer means: We are still grasping at straws.
Engineer says: We're working on a fresh approach to the problem.
Engineer means: We just hired three kids fresh out of university.
Engineer says: Close project co-ordination.
Engineer means: We know who to blame.
Engineer says: Major technological breakthrough.
Engineer means: It works OK, but looks very hi-tech.
Engineer says: Customer satisfaction upon delivery is assured.
Engineer means: We are so far behind schedule that the customer is happy to get it delivered.
Engineer says: Preliminary operational tests were inconclusive.
Engineer means: The darn thing blew up when we threw the switch.
Engineer says: Test results were extremely gratifying.
Engineer means: We are so surprised that the stupid thing works.
Engineer says: The entire concept will have to be abandoned.
Engineer means: The only person who understood the thing quit.
Engineer says: It is in process.
Engineer means: It is so wrapped up in red tape that the situation is hopeless.
Engineer says: We'll look into it.
Engineer means: Forget it! We have enough problems for now.
Engineer says: Please read and initial.
Engineer means: Let's spread the responsibility for the mistake.
Engineer says: Give us the benefit of your thoughts.
Engineer means: We'll listen to what you say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we've already done.
Engineer says: Give us your interpretation.
Engineer means: I can't wait to hear this!
Engineer says: See me/Let's Discuss.
Engineer means: Come into my office, I'm lonely.
Engineer says: All new!
Engineer means: Parts not interchangeable with the previous design.
Engineer says: Rugged.
Engineer means: Too heavy to lift!
Engineer says: Lightweight.
Engineer means: Lighter than rugged.
Engineer says: Years of development.
Engineer means: One finally worked.
Engineer says: Energy saving.
Engineer means: Achieved when the power switch is off.
Engineer says: Low maintenance.
Engineer means: Impossible to fix if broken.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
The man below says: "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees W. longitude."
"You must be an engineer," says the balloonist.
"I am," replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost.
"The man below says, "You must be a manager."
"I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."